If only

If I only I could tell you the things I pray for you…

-that your insides are and will be as beautiful as your incredibly handsome outside

– that you have a strong and ever growing relationship with God

-that you have a strong and close relationship with your children, and that they have a strong and close relationship with each other

-that your children have a strong and ever growing relationship with God

-that you set a Godly example for your kids, paving the way for a lifelong relationship and commitment to God

-that your relationship with your ex-wife is friendly, so you can work together to raise your children in the most stress-free way for all of you

– that God’s love crashes over you, wave after wave, and that you feel it and know it’s Him

– that God heals all of your hurts- past, present and future

-that God covers you in His grace, mercy,  forgiveness, love and peace

-that God gives you so, so many blessings- an abundance of them in every area of your life

-that God covers you with His protection, from the bottoms of your feet to the tips of your hair and everything in between

– that God grants you courage, wisdom and discernment

-that God gives you physical, spiritual, mental and emotional health

-that you understand the way that God sees you, and that you see it, too, and act in the way befitting of a man who is so very wonderfully loved simply for being who he is

I pray all these things and more for you.

And for myself, I pray that you come back into my world.  That I get to really know you.  And that you remain a part of my life on some level.

The Bees Knees # 1

A few of my favorite things this week:

1) The Young Riders


I loved the show The Young Riders when I was a kid.  I have been re-watching it, and it’s still awesome.  When I was a kid, I crushed on Buck and Ike:


This time around, I’m all about Jimmy:


However, the guys are all pretty darn cute!

2) Covet Fashion


I downloaded this app on the Google Play store.  It’s a super fun game where you enter challenges, design outfits, and pick hair and makeup to go with it.  It’s a free game, but you can buy extra diamonds and Covet cash if you want to.

3)  Hot chocolate
With wind chills in the negative fifties, it has been a “snuggle down on the couch wearing sweatpants, a long sleeve shirt, and a sweatshirt under 2 blankets with a warm puppy belly on my lap” couple of days.  What goes perfect with trying to stay warm and cozy?  Hot chocolate, of course.  With lots of marshmallows on top. 🙂

Letting Go

I recently did a 3 week fast with several other people from my church.  Everyone gave up different things- whatever they felt led to give up.  I had a horrible time leading up to the fast, trying to figure out what God wanted me to give up.  I threw around a ton of ideas, but nothing was really jumping out at me as *that* thing.

The night before the fast started, I was praying and asked God to show me or put in my mind what He wanted me to give up.  I picked my Bible up a few minutes later and opened it.  My eyes were drawn to Ecclesiastes 6:9, which says “enjoy what you have rather than desiring what you don’t have.  Just dreaming about nice things is meaningless, like chasing the wind.”

You guys.  I am such a daydreamer.  I’m always daydreaming about the house I want, the husband I want, etc.  My mind wanders through out the day, and I lay in bed at night thinking about these things.  God wanted me to stop living in my “dream life” and focus on what was right in front of me- and the biggest part of that is Him.

Every single night, when I go to bed, I have been picking up my Bible and spending time in His word since that night before the fast started- even now that the fast is over.  When I’m done, I turn my light off and spend time praying and just talking to my Heavenly Father until I go to sleep.  I am more focused on talking to Him throughout the day, praise Him more, and am more mindful of blessings.  I am so much happier.  And I am sleeping so much better, too.

I also gave up snacking for those 3 weeks. I messed up 3 times on this during the fast- not intentionally, but just mindlessly picking something up and eating it and then realizing “oh no!  I just ate something!”.  After the 3rd time, I decided I might as well give up this part of the fast- it wasn’t the thing that God showed me, so it didn’t really matter.  And then I picked up my Bible and read a verse that talked about not breaking promises we make to God.  And so I continued with the no snacking, too.  The not snacking was the hardest part of the fast for me.  As someone who snacks when they’re happy, sad, mad, bored, excited, disappointed, awake, breathing…   I pouted.  I whined to God.  I didn’t like it, and I told Him so.  I didn’t want to keep doing it.  I told Him that nearly every day.  And then I’d apologize for being a pouty, whiny brat later in the day.

I was reminded of so many things during the 3 week period.  I was reminded that actually feeling hunger is not the end of the world.  Being uncomfortable is ok.  It’s even good.  I was reminded that being content is so much better than living in a state of “I want” and “someday, I will have”.  God is in control, and He knows what He is doing.  That house I want?  And the husband I want?  I just need to let them go.  My human brain can daydream and imagine all it wants to, but whatever God has in store is better than anything or anyone I can imagine.

I can feel God on the move in my life, and I can’t wait to see what He does!



2019 Goals!

With 2019 right around the corner, it’s time to finalize my goals for the new year.  If I don’t put it down in writing, I will probably keep telling myself I can wait until the next day to do it- and before I know it, the year will be half over and I still won’t have my goals pinned down.  I am definitely a skilled procrastinator.

I prayed about my word of the year. I asked God to lead me in choosing my word.  Almost immediately, the word “remember” popped into my head.  I didn’t pay much attention to it and kept praying, and the same word kept coming to mind.  It wasn’t the kind of word I was looking for, and I wasn’t sure how “remember” would be a good choice for my word of the year.  And then I heard “Remember who and Whose you are”.

Over the last few years, I have felt God working to make me understand my worth and who I am in His eyes.  So when I heard “Remember who and Whose you are”, I realized that it is actually a pretty good word for the year.  Remember that I am God’s kid.  Remember how He sees me and that it’s way more important than how other people see me.

At church last Sunday, the Pastor commented on how negative thoughts come from the devil.  Something I knew but hadn’t really thought about in awhile.  So I want get in the habit in the coming year of remembering to kick out negative thoughts ASAP and replace them with positive thoughts.

I have a few goals that aren’t centered around “remember”, as well.  I found the Good Reads Challenge this last year and did it for 2018.  I want to do it again for 2019.  My goal is to read at least 30 books throughout the year.  I also want to make an effort to make lots of small healthy choices.  Little changes can add up to big things.

I went inactive with my Perfectly Posh business and have just reinstated it.  In 2019, I want to learn to really work my business and make a steady 2nd income from it.  I want to make it into a part time job.  I am in horrible debt, and I want to have a good enough Posh income to cover the payments.  I know I won’t get to that point immediately, but it’s possible if I can just figure out how to work my business correctly.  I have a goal of spending 10-15 hours a week working my Posh business.  10 hours to start out the year, and move into at least 15 hours per week.

Although it’s not a goal for the year, I am attempting to be more organized in 2019.  I have my planner for life in general, but I also got a handful of planners from the dollar store.

-One is for cleaning.  I will write weekly things that need done across each week and cross them off as I go.  It doesn’t matter what day I do things as long as I get them accomplished throughout the week.  I also have some monthly things listed on the side that I will cross off as I accomplish them.

-Another is for a supper menu.  I have been using blank monthly calendars that I printed off for the last few months, but for the new year, I want to use a planner.  That way, I’m less likely to lose my menu plan, and the menus for each month will be all in one place.  That way I can look back at previous months for ideas of things to make.

-I will also use one for Perfectly Posh.  I do all my parties on Facebook, so I will keep track of when I have parties scheduled.  I will also keep track of everything else I need to do that is Posh related.

I have a couple of spare planners for 2019 that I haven’t found a use for yet.  I may or may not end up using them, but at least I have them (and they were only $1 each!) if I think of anything to use them for.  What are your goals or words for the new year?


Life is made up of moments.  There are moments that you remember because they were happy, or sad, or fearful, or good, or bad.  We all have so many moments and memories that we remember.  They can be simple things from childhood that we enjoyed.  Or a really good day at work.  A memory of something that you shared with someone you love.  All kinds of things.

And then there are the moments that define us, because they impacted us so heavily.  I have a handful of these moments.  They are moments that cut me to my core or changed me in some way.

There was the moment that I saw the light catch the man I loved’s wedding ring for the first time after he got married to someone who wasn’t me.  The moment that I sat in a waiting room absolutely terrified, not knowing what was going to happen but knowing that I was at the end of my rope and desperately needed help.  The moment that God caught my attention and started me back toward the right path.  The moment that music changed my life.  The moment that I first set foot inside my current church.

Life brings many moments, some that just pass by and some that stand out.  Every moment is not good, but I am thankful for every moment.  And I am thankful for a God that chooses to be there for each of my moments.


Trust In You- Lauren Daigle

This is one of my absolute favorite songs lately.  It reminds me that my hope and trust are in God alone.  No matter what is going on in my life, He already knows the outcome, and all I need to do is have faith.

Jesus: The Real Super Hero

I woke up in the middle of the night on Sunday, and found a thought in my head that I never would’ve thought of on my own.   There was a little voice in my head, telling me to make a video about Jesus being the real super hero.  All these thoughts came behind it- things to say, points to make, etc.  I am not a video girl.  That’s not something I would ever do.  I tried to push it out of my mind, but the thoughts kept coming back on Monday.  On my lunch break, I sat down, wrote out what I wanted to say in about 5 minutes- again, the thoughts just spilling out. I grabbed my phone and shot a video right then and there.  I sent it to my friend April and wasn’t sure if I would do any more with it.  Because again- posting a video of myself is so not me.  Between her encouragement, and the little voice that kept telling me “I told you to make the video.  I told you what you need to do.  You need to do this”, I finally posted the video on Facebook this morning.  I’m going to post a link to it here.

Jesus: The Real Super Hero

I honestly expected negative comments from some of my facebook friends, but not a single person has posted a negative comment, and it’s been around 10 hours since I’ve posted it.  Someone actually asked me to make it public so they could share it, and a few others have shared it.  I’ve had several likes and comments.  They’re God’s words, not mine.  But I’m excited, because maybe it will reach someone who needs it and make a difference for them.

The Little Things


It’s the little things in life that make life truly worth living.  If you focus solely on the big things, most of your days will be wasted just waiting for something to be thankful for or happy about.  For me, some of my favorite “little things” are coming home to my dog- she’s always SO excited to see me, and vice versa; bed time, when I can have some peace and quiet; and time spent at church because to me, it is the place where I am happiest and most at home.  What are some of the little things that you love most?